Reinventing your Life: 2. The 11 Life Traps Explained

Two life traps relate to a lack of safety or security in your childhood family. These are Abandonment and Mistrust.

Abandonment: people you love will leave you
Mistrust and Abuse: people will hurt and abuse you

Two life traps relate to our ability to function independently in the world. These are Dependence and Vulnerability.

Dependence: unable to handle everyday life without help from others
Vulnerability: live in fear that disaster is about to strike

Two life traps relate to the strength of your emotional connections to others: Emotional Deprivation and Social Exclusion.

Emotional Deprivation: need for love will never be met by other people
Social Exclusion: feeling isolated from the rest of the world; feeling different

The life traps that relate to self-esteem are Defectiveness and Failure.

Defectiveness: inwardly flawed and defective. Fundamentally unlovable.
Failure: Inadequate in areas of achievement, school, work, sports

The life traps that deal with Self-Expression - Your ability to express what you want and get your true needs met are Subjugation and Unrelenting Standards.

Subjugation: sacrifice your own needs and desires for the sake of pleasing others or meeting their needs. You allow others to control you.
Unrelenting Standards: strive relentlessly to meet extremely high expectations of yourself. Excess emphasis on status, money, achievement, beauty, order, or recognition at the expense of happiness, pleasure, health, and satisfying relationships.

The final life trap is Entitlement

Entitlement: inability to accept realistic limits in life. Spoiled as children.